My toes

For Kim..pics of my pedicure....

Come

I have found that lately I am guilty of thinking too much.
I have always been a thinker. For instance, when I worked those long days at the pool as a lifeguard, my friend, Todd, would often comment, "What are you thinking about?" I would ask him how he knew I was thinking about something. He would comment on how my eyes and face seemed to say to him that I was often pondering something. What he didn't know was that I was half praying, half thinking most of the time.

Thinking.
I wonder lately I am thinking more than I am praying.
I think more than I talk to God about the constant struggles right now with life. Struggles, that are chances to see more of my Saviour, if I choose to see them that way. As of late, some things are never far from my mind. I often try to block them out, I guess in some way hoping they are not real. I do know there is very real hurt. I do know that God is working. I know that NO MATTER WHAT God will be glorified.
It is also difficult to focus when so many things are going on. My mind is like this computer. Right now I have about four different windows open. I am listening to music, checking movie times, writing this post, checking myspace, all simultaneously. God is calling me to leave his "window" open throughout my busy day. At some point, I long for the opportunity to shut the other "windows" and focus on him. I must pray for those opportunities.
God is making me daily. He knows and loves who I am but he wants so much more. He also sees the body of believers and wants to make them. Whoa to me if I stand in the way of God's making.

So I go back to questioning myself. Are you thinking or are you praying? God calls me to come.

Omniplex day

Here's a few pics of my trip with the Gardeners, Greins, and Megan to the Omniplex.

Tri - State Collage

Last week was a blast...here are a few choice moments... God is so good. And yes that is Trevor in a cow suit. Don't ask. And yes that is a girl sitting on ice. Again, don't ask.

The Sadness

I can't say a lot about what is going on with my church but please be in prayer. I have learned a few things thus far. Sin, if left alone, will destroy your life and everyone else's around you. God is faithful, no matter what.

The Spice

The Spice..... The Agony....For all you Dune fans. Everyone else is saying, "Huh?"

Seemed appropriate

Am I at the point of no improvement?
What are the deaths I still dwell in?
I try to excel but I feel no movement
Can I be free of this unreleasable sin

CHORUS:
Never underestimate my Jesus
your tellin me that there's no hope
I�m tellin you your wrong
Never underestimate my Jesus
when the world around you crumbles
He will be strong he will be strong

I throw up my hands
oh the impossibilities
Frustrated and tired
Where do I go from here?
Now I�m searchin' for
The confidence I lost so willingly
Overcoming these obstacles
Is overcoming my fears

CHORUS

I think I can't
I think I can't
but I think you can
I think you can
gather my insufficiencies and
place them in your hands
place them in your hands
place them in your hands.

CHORUS (2x)
You will be strong (3x)

Reliant K Never Underestimate My Jesus

On other things

I decided to post for this week. Trevor is at Falls Creek and I will join him for like a day and half. For those of you know don't know what Falls Creek is, get with the program! Just kidding, its the huge mega Baptist youth camp. This will be my first overnight stay.
I also had to add that I finished Dune last week. The ENTIRE six books, yes. It was good. The ending fit. In Leto II's words, "We go forward. We go back."
I am working on some motivational reading that T recommended. We'll see how it goes. Until next time......keep reading!

Arkansas CU Camp

Here's some pictures from the Christian Union Camp in Arkansas, where Trevor played music last week. Enjoy.

No pictures

No pictures will be available until I can find a way to get them off my digital camera. I broke Trev's card reader and can't find the cable to connect my camera to the computer. I guess once we clean up the mess in the computer room we MIGHT find it. But until then we will be pictureless.
Sorry everyone.

Weekend Trip

Last week Trevor went to Lawson to work on his dad's deck and then I joined him on Thursday. I had a lot of fun hanging out with the fam and meeting some of Trevor' s old gang. Our good friends the Danners, Justin and Annie, were married on Saturday afternoon in a beautiful but simple ceremony. We even got to hang out with the Knutters and Kirk and Dana Polo. We did however get home at 7:30 this morning and that was not fun. Pictures to follow tomorrow hopefully.

Mistakes

Yes, I messed up again. But this time it wasn't just an error at work it was an error in judgement. A failure to be fully what God wants me to be. I did something that wasn't very nice, and definitely not Christ-like. How can I be more immersed in God's love so I won' t be like this? I need people praying for me. My stress level, my prayer life, my attitude. I covet your prayers because what I have done repels people and doesn't draw them to the Lord. That is why my life must scream, " I love my Christ!" every day, every moment. I can't slip. I must try to fix what I have done but knowing I can't truly fix it. I just have to realize I am not perfect.
"Perfect. I'm not perfect but I know someone who is...." Jesus fix what I can't fix.

Never alone

"Jesus included me, Yes He Included me, When the Lord said whosoever, he included me."


Let's start off with this is not intended to come off as Amanda's pity party. Yes I am alone for three days but its ok. Gives me time to think.
Do you ever have days where you feel like you just don't fit in? I mean I was at church with friends today after I spent time with most of them in the last two weeks.Even hung out with some yesterday. Maybe its my fault. Maybe I don't know how to interact well with others. But I know this is not true since I do so all the time with these very people. Why do I always feel like I don't fit in?
Not really sure the answers to those questions but I am sure that I need to make more of effort to approach people. I need to stop letting the thought enter my head that I am "in the way." Trevor has a knack for this type of interaction. I do not. That is why I have to make more of an effort but also be understanding. I also need to remember to include other people so they don't feel like I feel now.
I pray that the GROW ministry starts to fill in the gaps for people who come in who are like me. I pray that people always feel welcome in Calvary Baptist Church's family. I am just thankful that Jesus included me.

A reminder for myself...an old post from last year....

Through the disappointments and frustrations of the last few weeks, I have to keep coming back to my foundation (I Cor. 3:11). My foundation is my relationship/identity in Christ. I have to stop making excuses and simply BE the woman has called me to be. For example, when a patient is admitted to my group at work, I usually say, "What?" Instead, I should be thinking of this as an opportunity, not an obstacle, even though I was caught up and now I'm not. Unfortunately, in my present state of mind it will take a lot to get me to that point.
But that is simply not what I am. I am called a new name by God himself. I am no longer Deserted nor Desolate. I am married. I am one with God himself. He has made his dwelling in me (I Cor 6:19). God takes delight in me! I am a crown of splendor in the hand of God himself!
I refuse to see these things as "my job." They are miracles disguised as interruptions, frustrations, and otherwise labeled as "problems." I must be like-minded as Christ the great physician. I must let the people come to me, so that I may glorify Him. They will come to me with their complaints, gripes, and needs and I will respond in kindness as He responded to me. I must.

Happy Birthday Claudette!!!

Erin and Jared's Wedding

Erin and Jared's Wedding In Salt Lake City

The Beautiful Clare

This is after Nursing Pinning at OBU on Friday.

I'm Free...

No it's not just a Newsboys song. This weekend I had an "opportunity" to think about freedom. Now before I lose a lot of you guys, read the last post about SLC and if you are still shaking your head about what I mean, ask me and I will explain). There was an accusation that was not true. And in Trevor's opinion, I should not have even considered it. But as part of the normal population (sorry Trevor you are excluded) I was pretty concerned about this accusation. I started to get paranoid and think that what I do is wrong on this blog and on the internet is wrong. But I really prayed about it and sought wise counsel. I concluded that what I do here is not damaging to my witness but should always be something I consider in everything I do and say. I thought about Galatians, where people in the early church were saying Christians need to follow the law to be saved. In essence they told people, " What you are doing is wrong. " Paul countered with many reasons why the accusers (the Judaizers) were in fact the ones in the wrong. Paul said emphatically that if the law saves us then we have no need for Christ!(Amanda paraphrase) The law does not and did not save, fortunately for us. Paul proclaimed that, "It is for freedom, Christ has set us free!" This is my resolve for people who try to tell me I am wrong (and what they are really saying is that they are right)
God gave me a brain so I can research and search out who God is.
God gave me a heart that hurts too when people judge me when they have no right to (Jesus himself said so, and I better not be judging anyone else!)
God also lets me live in a free country where I can express my thoughts without thought of repercussion.
Thank God I'm Free!!!!

From SLC

Greetings everyone from Salt Lake City, LDS central! (For anyone who doesn't know, LDS is the Mormons or Later Day Saints). I am here for a wedding of a good, no great, friend of mine, Erin Gray, soon to be Young. Trevor didn't get to come this time.
The flight out had a layover in Phoenix, Arizona. The airport was nice at least. I arrived in SLC about 12:00 last night.
Anyway, been a busy weekend already. Yesterday, I went to Nursing Pinning at OBU. It was nice. I was shocked how big the classes are getting! That's good news for my profession, which is so chronically understaffed.
I will have pictures later of the beautiful Clare and the gorgeous Erin for your perusal (that means so you can look at them Justin(: ). Later everyone!

Happy Birthday Caleb!!!

Since tomorrow is my brother's birthday, I decided to wish him the best today. My brother Caleb will be 24 years old tomorrow, May 12,2006.