Monday, April 09, 2007

Top ten reasons I didn't answer my phone today

Here's the scoop. At the hospital, nurses and aides have to carry phones with them and I become more and more annoyed by the thing. Here are the top ten reasons I didn't answer it:

10) The battery has a life of about 3 minutes and it has ALREADY gone dead for the fifth time in a row.
9) I'm hiding from the doctors, they might find something for me to do (Actually they are probably busy ignoring MY page)
8) I'm hiding from the crazy family members who call at 7:30 AM to ask how Aunt Sally "is doing." ( I don't know, I haven't seen them yet and even if I had I can't tell you,please call later so you can interrupt what I'm dong again)
7)I'm hiding from all the people who want something RIGHT NOW at shift change.
6) I am up to my elbows in something. Use your imagination.
5) I actually found five minutes to go the bathroom so I didn't pee my pants, thank you.
4)I ate my phone due to my extreme hunger. You hear it ringing? Yeah its actually in my colon. You mind answering for me.
3)My phone accidentally fell in the toilet and I accidentally flushed it. Refer to # 5.
2)My phone accidentally fell on the floor and I accidentally stepped on it.
1) It's amazing my phone learned to fly...out the window! I can fly, I can fly, I can fly!

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