tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-248101892024-03-12T20:37:55.792-05:00Two Pennies in My PocketI've got two pennies in my pocket
But what's in my heart is worth more than what's in my hand. --Between ThievesAmandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.comBlogger150125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-34898643718277259952010-09-12T17:37:00.004-05:002010-09-12T18:14:54.184-05:00I need a joy transfusionHad some struggles this weekend. This goes along with the saying, "You are either about to enter a storm, going through a storm, or coming out of a storm." Hopefully this is the coming out of the storm part.<br />Just suffice to say that I have been and am going through some trials in my life. God has taught me some things while going through these trials not the least of which is joy. I am not talking about joy because "I got a new car" joy or "I got a raise" joy but a joy that endures. I talking about the joy that not based on money, good fortune, or lack of hard times. I am talking about a joy that endures when everything falls apart, everything seems to go wrong, and nothing goes as planned.<br />To quote Charles Swindoll in <span style="font-style: italic;">Laugh Again, Experience Outrageous Joy </span>(an amazing find at the bargain book store) "I know of no greater need today than the need for joy. Unexplainable, contagious joy. Outrageous joy." Unexplainable, contagious joy. I like that. I want that. I <span style="font-style: italic;">need </span>that.<br />So this is me repenting of my recent lack of joy. Yes, lack of joy <span style="font-style: italic;">is </span>a sin because when it comes down to it the ability to maintain joy is a matter of choice. I can choose to be remain unhappy or I can choose to rejoice in God. To quote Charles Swindoll again, "People who choose joy pay no attention to what day of the week it is..or how old they are...what level of pain they are in. They have deliberately decided to laugh again because they have chosen joy. People who do not choose joy miss the relief laughter can bring. And because they do not, they cannot. And because they do not, they cannot. And because they can't, they won't. Which one are you?" Today, I repent of my lack of joy. Today, I chose joy.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-1765326537637098952010-09-12T17:37:00.000-05:002010-09-12T17:37:12.202-05:00Jack doesn't really have to go outside.<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/TI1WFV-vSOI/AAAAAAAAAVI/MqFUJMzQcds/s1600/SSPX0523.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; FLOAT: left; CLEAR: both" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/TI1WFV-vSOI/AAAAAAAAAVI/MqFUJMzQcds/s320/SSPX0523.jpg" /></a><div style='clear:both; text-align:LEFT'><a href='http://picasa.google.com/blogger/' target='ext'><img src='http://photos1.blogger.com/pbp.gif' alt='Posted by Picasa' style='border: 0px none ; padding: 0px; background: transparent none repeat scroll 0% 50%; -moz-background-clip: initial; -moz-background-origin: initial; -moz-background-inline-policy: initial;' align='middle' border='0' /></a></div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-59624734649193072032010-08-16T02:01:00.004-05:002010-08-18T04:12:46.921-05:00...just a little bit<div style="text-align: center;">*Warning! Contains potential spoilers*<br /></div><br /><br />I had a fun weekend with my mom and sister when they came to visit this past weekend. We ate out--probably way too much, went to a concert, and took in a couple of movies. The first movie was <span style="font-style: italic;">Eat Pray Love</span> starring Julia Roberts. <span style="font-style: italic;">Eat Pray Love</span> is based on Elizabeth Gilbert's memoirs about her year-long journey around the world to discover her life's meaning.<br />The movie was refreshingly not the usual stereotypical romance/chick flick. <span style="font-style: italic;">Eat Pray Love</span> appears to convincingly show one woman's progress towards inner peace through divorce, meditation, and abroad.<br />As I said, I enjoyed the movie as it shows the inner journey one woman experienced. <span style="font-style: italic;">Eat Pray Love</span> is as heartwarming as it is eye opening to the meshing of cultures, religions, and paradigms. It speaks to the increasingly spiritual but not necessarily religious culture we live in today. Of course the lens I encounter the world through relates how the spiritual material matches up with my belief that Christ is the only way to inner peace so I disagree fundamentally with the premise that you have to "find" yourself in gurus, meditation, or other religious practice. Yet, in all honesty, I considered how I could easily allow myself to sit in the theater for 2 hours and merely "feel good" and be entertained. <br />I also considered the sermon I recently watched online from Craig Groeschel titled <span style="font-style: italic;">Toxic</span>, where Craig explains that some of the things we ingest in culture--movies, music, etc are poison. He also equates this to if we made a batch of brownies and put just a little bit of dog poop in them. Most of us would say, "Dog poop. Ew gross!" Even if it's just a little bit, most people would agree just a little bit of dog poop is still gross. <br />So I would say I watched <span style="font-style: italic;">Eat Pray Love</span>, was entertained by it, got a few "warm fuzzies" from its heart warming message, at times was even challenged in my thinking but did not allow myself to digest it in its entirety. I was aware enough to realize that I find meaning in Christ alone--not in relationships, religion, or meditation. So in my humble opinion, Eat Pray Love contained a little dog poop--just a little bit.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-19658415526287758392010-08-11T16:38:00.003-05:002010-08-11T16:42:54.841-05:00The Way of Love...because the Word says it so much better than I ever could... <sup class="versenum" id="bg_passage-12229"><br /><br /><br />1</sup> If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don't love, I'm nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. <sup class="versenum" id="bg_passage-12230">2</sup>If I speak God's Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, "Jump," and it jumps, but I don't love, I'm nothing. <sup class="versenum" id="bg_passage-12231">3-7</sup>If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love.<br /><br /> Love never gives up.<br /> Love cares more for others than for self.<br /> Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.<br /> Love doesn't strut,<br /> Doesn't have a swelled head,<br /> Doesn't force itself on others,<br /> Isn't always "me first,"<br /> Doesn't fly off the handle,<br /> Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,<br /> Doesn't revel when others grovel,<br /> Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,<br /> Puts up with anything,<br /> Trusts God always,<br /> Always looks for the best,<br /> Never looks back,<br /> But keeps going to the end. <p></p> <sup class="versenum" id="bg_passage-12232">8-10</sup>Love never dies. Inspired speech will be over some day; praying in tongues will end; understanding will reach its limit. We know only a portion of the truth, and what we say about God is always incomplete. But when the Complete arrives, our incompletes will be canceled. <p></p> <sup class="versenum" id="bg_passage-12233">11</sup>When I was an infant at my mother's breast, I gurgled and cooed like any infant. When I grew up, I left those infant ways for good. <p></p> <sup class="versenum" id="bg_passage-12234">12</sup>We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us! <p></p> <sup class="versenum" id="bg_passage-12235">13</sup>But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love. (<a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+Corinthians+13+&version=MSG&src=embed">1 Corinthians 13</a>, <a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/versions/Message-MSG-Bible/?src=embed">The Message</a>)Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-81183433531461578032010-08-04T00:45:00.002-05:002010-08-04T01:12:09.076-05:00A work uncomplete<div id="containerin"><span class="indquote_link">~ No relationship in life can be any more successful than what we are willing to learn about ourselves through it. The moment we turn our back on what others give us to see about ourselves, we not only walk away from what we need to see, but also from the better person we could be . . . were we only willing to learn the lesson at hand. ~</span> <div id="authortab"><span class="author_text">Guy Finley</span></div></div><br />Despite great trials, amidst great joy, and with much grace, I journey on. I am thankful for what God has taught me this season, what He is teaching me, and what I have yet to learn. God <span style="font-style: italic;">is </span>faithful, lest I forget.<br />I am learning how the greatest fears in me are simply what I see in myself. God continues to shine light into the dark places in me. This is an altogether painful but beautiful process. <br />God is continually revealing the courage within me to chase lions and live dangerously in the will of God. I will no longer run from pain but learn to embrace it. In embracing pain I will learn what Jesus says in Matthew 14: 24-25, "Don't run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I'll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. (The Message)<br /><br />For the friends who continue with me on this journey, I cannot thank you enough. For those who have just joined me, thank you. For those who have parted ways, may God bless you and keep you.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-40618539101534176842010-03-07T23:31:00.004-06:002010-03-08T01:31:03.687-06:00Learning to Dance in the Rain<span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="font-family:lucida grande;">The last few days have been trying to say the least. God sure is answering my prayer to prune me. I am thinking now about how much I just want to be with Him. I used to think that people who said, "Jesus, hurry and bring your kingdom." were crazy. I thought,"I have not lived life yet and there are still things God promised me (I wanted) to </span>do!" I considered how unfair of God to come back and interrupt my life. Yet, as I consider how this life must pale in comparison to the one to come, I realize how God is so much more just than I could ever imagine if he chose to interrupt my life by moving me on to the next.<br />I have been thinking about what it means to truly walk with God, in this life and what it might be like in the next. I just keep picturing a peaceful place. Like a distant island misted in rain-- but so beautiful! That is why if I am not careful I can make a functional heaven out of "vacation". But that is a different sermon for another day. Aside, if you are interested in this topic check out Pastor Mark <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Driscoll's</span> sermon series <a href="http://www.marshillchurch.org/media/religionsaves"><span style="font-style: italic;">Religion Saves.</span></a><br />Now back to my secluded island resplendent with cool beauty. Why do I picture it in the rain? I think because I feel so dry and scorched from the harsh brightness of the world that to picture it in the sun seems somehow wrong. Many times in the last few days I just want to give up. I am tired of trying and failing and trying and failing. I want to be where God promised me I would be but don't know how He is going to get me there. I picture the island today in a way that brings peace and joy to my weary soul mostly because God is there. He walks beside me as I smell the gentle rain coming I fear might ruin my otherwise "perfect" day at the beach. His hand holds mine when the thunder booms in the distance. His arm holds onto me as the lightning flashes come closer.<span style="font-style: italic;"></span><span style="font-style: italic;"></span> The big drops of rain start splashing my face and hair and I forget about how wet my clothes will be. I hardly feel them anymore. All I know is that God is with me and surrounding me all at the same time. It is in this moment I realize, <span style="font-style: italic;">God is in the rain</span>. I tip my head back as the water splashes my face and falls down over my lips so I taste the coolness of it. I begin to dance as I taste and feel and smell the goodness of God falling all around me. The sun starts to come out but only so I can see the rainbow in the sky reminding me that God will be with me and has been all along.<br />Though I am sure that this all sounds so sappy and maybe a little crazy to you, all this comes from the depth of my soul. I realize that the fruit that God wants me to bear is joy--deep, abiding joy, found only in Him. That is why I am not waiting for the storm to pass. I am learning to dance in the rain. Tonight I pray God sends me a sweet dream of the rain.<br /><span style="font-style: italic;"><br />Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God for I will let praise him, my Savior, my God.<br />Psalm 42:11<br /><br />If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete.<br />John 15:10-11<br /></span><br /><br /><br /></span></span>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-33778825392878848592010-03-04T01:58:00.003-06:002010-03-04T02:57:27.229-06:00Pulling Weeds.Today, as I was driving along listening Between Thieves, a band from way back in my high school days, I was suddenly transported back in time. I started thinking about a time in my life that was much simpler in many ways. With less responsibilities and more time than I will EVER have again, I was free to envision how my life might be used to glorify God. Back in those days I faithfully read my Bible, listened to Christian music, and dreamt about my life beyond the small town where I felt trapped. At least my best friend was there, Claudette. Oh how I thanked God for her companionship. We spent hours in her room listening to music and discussing our futures far away from the reaches of that little town.<br />I remember that person I once was and often envy her. This is a strange thing to say especially since that person <span style="font-style: italic;">was</span> and <span style="font-style: italic;">is </span>me. In some ways, I still see glimpses of that girl who attended concerts and conferences and dreamed about how God could use her life to glorify himself. I can honestly say I never in my wildest dreams would have seen where that journey has brought me today.<br /> That girl from the past believed that she could truly change the world in Jesus' name. Sometimes I wonder if I <span style="font-style: italic;">really</span> believe this to to be true in my heart of hearts. Don't get me wrong, that young girl still had a lot of selfishness that God had to work out of her and even now still has much to go in that regard.<br />I spent so much time hating that point in my life when Claudette graduated and moved away. We can never have those precious days back. The thing I remember so clearly about that time was how I looked with such expectant hope toward the future.<br />But as Jesus warned me in the parable of the sower (Matthew 13), the worries of the world have grown up like weeds and choked out the word, causing me to be unfruitful. Causing me to have a lack of joy.<br />Now, I cry out to the Father, the gardener (John 15) to help me pull up these weeds. This is a painful process I know but necessary for me to regain my vision completely. God is faithful even when I am not. He prunes my branches by cutting off what is dead so I can be even more fruitful (John 15:2) . I pray to the True Vine (Jesus) that he might graft me closer into him. I want to be fruitful in Christ, proving myself to be Christ's disciple and revealing God's glory to the world (John 15:8).<br /><br /> <span style="font-style: italic;">Because You also promise I am already clean because of the words You have spoken to me (John 15: 3), remind me of that time in my life when I was so full of hope and love.</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;">Despite the Rain By Between Thieves<br /></div><br />I just can't move past these mistakes I've made<br />With every step I'm tripping as i try to walk away<br />I guess some kind of penance might ease my mind<br />The harder I try the more I find...<br />All I have to do is look to you<br />And I will never be the same<br />My life's been changed<br />And like a child I will play despite the rain<br />Why do I persist to ram my head against the wall?<br />Why do I pretend there's nothing wrong at all?<br />Sometimes I wonder why you still fight for me<br />It's a mystery<br />But whenever I'm in doubt...<br />All I have to do is look to you<br />And I will never be the same<br />My life's been changed<br />And like a child I will play despite the rain<br />All I have to do is live for you<br />And when I call upon your name<br />Your love remains<br />And like a child I will play <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">despite</span> the rain<br />Staring in the mirror I see more of you<br />The reflection of my hearts change<br />Now there is hope<br />Now there is peace<br />Your love has set me free free oh<br />All I have to do is look to you<br />And I will never be the same<br />My life's been changed<br />And like a child I will play despite the rain<br />All I have to do is live for you<br />And when I call upon your name<br />Your love remains<br />And like a child I will play despite the rain<br />I will play (3x)<br />Despite the rainAmandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-74276924897663881552010-01-31T17:38:00.005-06:002010-01-31T18:07:21.187-06:00Beautiful Bride.Watch the Flyleaf video for Beautiful Bride. It says it all.<div> I love this song. It plays in my head (and usually cranked up all the way in my car) as I drive to Bible study to spend time with my sisters. I love my sisters. </div><div>It plays in my head when we take a friend out to dinner to help her remember her joy for one evening. Did I mention I love my sisters?</div><div>It plays in my head when I participate in a memorial service for a sister who has gone on to be with the Lord. I love my family.</div><div>It plays in my head when I drive to church on Saturday night or Sunday morning to spend time celebrating God's goodness with fellow believers. I love my brothers and sisters.</div><div>I love the body, the bride of Christ. How beautiful the body is when we function as one.</div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms', arial, helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><i><br /></i></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:'trebuchet ms', arial, helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><i>1 Corinthians 12:12 "For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ."</i></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms', arial, helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><i><br /></i></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms', arial, helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">But as I said, Flyleaf says it quite well.</span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms', arial, helvetica;font-size:100%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:13px;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms', arial, helvetica;font-size:100%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:13px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial;font-size:12px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" white-space: normal; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 0px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 0px; line-height: 18px; font-family:Tahoma, sans-serif;font-size:13px;">Beautified diversity<br />Functioning as one body<br />Every part encouraged by the other<br />No one independent of another<br />You're irreplaceable<br />Indespensable,<br />You're incredible<br />You're incredible<br /><br />Beautiful bride<br />Body of Christ<br />One flesh abiding<br />Strong and unifying<br />Fighting ends in forgiveness<br />Unite and fight all division<br />Beautiful bride<br /><br />Strengthen your arms now<br />Train your fingers for battle<br />Urgency's here now<br />Train your fingers for battle<br />Fighting this violence<br />With your feet wrapped in peace<br />Sad tears and silence<br />Now screams of joy<br />Victory<br /><br />Beautiful bride<br />Body of Christ<br />One flesh abiding<br />Strong and unifying<br />Fighting ends in forgiveness<br />Unite and fight all division<br />Beautiful bride<br /><br />Beautiful bride<br />Body of Christ<br />One flesh abiding<br />Strong and unifying<br />Fighting ends in forgiveness<br />Unite and fight all division<br />Beautiful bride<br /><br />We're not gonna fall and forget<br />How far you went to pick us up<br />If one parts hurt the whole bodys sick<br />If one part mourns we all mourn with Him<br />Rejoice, we'll sing with you<br />Hallelujah,<br />Hallelujah,<br />Hallelujah,<br />Hallelujah<br /><br />Beautiful bride<br />Body of Christ<br />One flesh abiding<br />Strong and unifying<br />Fighting ends in forgiveness<br />Unite and fight all division<br />Beautiful bride<br /><br />Beautiful bride<br />Body of Christ<br />One flesh abiding<br />Strong and unifying<br />Fighting ends in forgiveness<br />Unite and fight all division<br />Beautiful bride</span></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:Tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" line-height: 18px;font-size:-webkit-xxx-large;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:Tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" line-height: 18px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">Flyleaf, Beautiful Bride</span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms', arial, helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><i><br /></i></span></span></div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-48855487993986328422010-01-31T17:31:00.001-06:002010-01-31T17:31:48.636-06:00<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/XfW4CkYrjXs&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/XfW4CkYrjXs&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="always" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-46202732735095347112009-12-13T00:47:00.001-06:002009-12-13T00:47:45.852-06:00Oh How He Loves Us<script type="text/javascript" src="http://widgets.metrolyrics.com/o/492da13d111f5ab4/4b248e10bd305888/4942b69c72ae4040/c1221957/widget.js"></script><br /><br /><a href="http://www.metrolyrics.com/" target="_blank">Lyrics</a><br /><br />Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-27996580479255064322009-12-12T23:36:00.007-06:002009-12-13T03:18:24.378-06:00BlessedWow it has been a while since I last posted. Life has been crazy but it has slowed down a bit to allow a few moments catch my breath and think again.<br />As I said, I have been busy almost to the point of excess but as my husband reminds me, it is just a season. And it is just a season. Sometimes I am concerned that the next will be more busy than the last. I like to think I have learned a few things to make it easier to cope. During those hard and crazy times I have to remember to emphasize the things that are good with my life and look over the bad.<br />One of the helpful things I have learned is how much God loves me. Often I am caught up in the wonder that God could do such a thing as love me so much that He would send His only son to die for me. I am amazed how He could love such an ungrateful, unwilling, selfish person like me but he does! He loves me apart from anything I could ever do or say or be.<span style="font-style: italic;"> <span style="font-style: italic;"></span></span>God seems to remind me of this again and again by sending this message to me in various forms.<br />I have talked about how work is difficult for me. Lately, work has been, for lack of a better description,<span style="font-style: italic;"> work</span>, or difficult <span style="font-style: italic;">labor. </span>Whatever I call it, it has been trying to say the very least. I know where I want to go in my career and in my life but here I am at the same "temporary" job I started last March. I am sick of the crazy patients, working nights, the 45 minute drive <span style="font-style: italic;">each </span>way and the asinine"stuff" that usually accompanies my job. Even so, I have to consider how God looks out for in allowing me an occasional "good" night. I am grateful how God has provided (very well I might add) through this job, I have good people to work with on night shift, and what has been a mostly flexible schedule. Last week I even had a very tangible way God surely watches over me while I work.<br />One of my patients had been extremely confused all night long. I even talked to a more experienced nurse and we looked at the chart together to figure out why. We thought maybe the pain medicine could be causing it. I found out the next day the true reason why: a massive pulmonary embolism in her main bronchus. That patient could have dropped dead on my shift and probably should have but God looked out for her--- and me too. A long story short, I almost quit nursing early in my career over a patient who coded at the end of my shift and ending up dying from a pulmonary embolus. God will not give me beyond what I can handle. That was proof enough for me. Thank you, God, that patient did not die.<br />Another way I see God expressing His love for me in my friendships. I am thankful for friends who always make me feel worthwhile (Thanks Kendal). I am also thankful for friends who stop by while they are in town to have coffee and chat (Thanks Alicia) and who stay in touch (Thanks Pam). Lastly, I am thankful for an unexpected evening of having a meaning conversation (Thanks Stephanie). The last one only came because God has helped me understand that my plans are not always the best plans. I know shocking, right? I thank God for changing the plan when I need Him to change my plan.<br />Yet another way I see God making things right is in my relationship with my husband. The last few months we have had a rough time communicating and such. Marriage is not easy, no, but hard work as I have been so adequately reminded lately. I partially attribute the good state of things to the aforementioned growing ability to look at the good and overlook the bad. I also believe the prayers of so many friends has made so much difference. I feel the power of those prayers on those days when things seem so hopeless but I still feel hope. Thank you for praying for me and my marriage. Thank you.<br />I give most of the good quality of our marriage to the grace of God who loves us so much. In this season, I pray that you see the fullness of the riches of God in every possible way ( Ephesians 2:7). Hope does not disappoint us as so many things in life can (James 1:4). Hope does not give up. I pray you possess this hope each day in the Lord Jesus Christ, who loves you so much.<br /><br />I listen to this song.<br /><br />Oh How He Loves Us<br />Music by David Crowder<br />Words by John Mark Mcmillan<br /><br />He is jealous for me,<br />Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,<br />Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.<br />When all of a sudden,<br />I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,<br />And I realise just how beautiful You are,<br />And how great Your affections are for me.<br /><br />And oh, how He loves us so,<br />Oh how He loves us,<br />How He loves us all<br /><br />Yeah, He loves us,<br />Oh! how He loves us,<br />Oh! how He loves us,<br />Oh! how He loves.<br /><br /><br />We are His portion and He is our prize,<br />Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,<br />If grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking.<br />And Heaven meets earth like an unforseen kiss,<br />And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,<br />I don’t have time to maintain these regrets,<br />When I think about, the way…Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-73146052430824432752009-08-06T14:25:00.004-05:002009-08-06T15:07:21.194-05:00Willing?<span style="font-size:130%;">One of the most quoted scriptures relating to missions is Isaiah 6: 1-8. The prophet Isaiah sees a vision of God seated on his throne in his holiness. Isaiah comes to understand how unclean he is in the sight of God so He sends an angel with a live coal to purify Isaiah's lips. God says, "Whom shall I send? Who will go for us?" Isaiah says, "Here am I. Send me!' Immediately God gives Isaiah his request.<br />Like the rest of us who sign up to follow God and be his ambassadors to the world, I doubt that Isaiah realized what he had signed up for. As soon Isaiah said, "Here am I. Send me!" God sends Isaiah with a terrible message to Israel.<br />God also called Isaiah to do some strange things to get the message across to Israel. Isaiah had a son he named Shear-Jashub which translated "a remnant will return" which I am sure held just a little comfort for the terrible visions Isaiah had been having of what was to come to pass for Israel. The second son he named Maher-Shalal-Hash-Baz which did not hold so pleasant a meaning. "Shazzy's" name was a prophecy from God that before he could talk, one of Israel's enemy would be plundered.<br />As I was reading yesterday I came across the vision where God told Isaiah to "Take off the sackcloth from your body and sandals from your feet." ( Isaiah 20:2) So Isaiah walked around </span><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:130%;" >in the most</span><span style="font-size:130%;"> a loincloth for </span><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:130%;" >3 years! <span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><br /><br /><br /></span></span></span><span style="font-size:130%;">When I came across this passage yesterday I had to ask myself, "If God asked me to do that would I?" Would I walk around barefoot in my underwear for three years if God asked me to? When Isaiah said,"Here am I. Send me !" Do you think he knew what he was signing up for? But we </span><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:130%;" >are</span><span style="font-size:130%;"> called to be ambassadors of Christ to reconcile people to God ( 2 Corinthians 5:20-21). So when I say to God, "Use me." I better mean it because he will do just that in ways I cannot even imagine. He might have my husband play in a band that takes a lot of time and money but effectively reaches many young people for Christ. He might have me work in a difficult place so others might see and hear the truth. He might send me to camps where my husband and I minister to youth by wild and crazy games. So yes, Lord, Here am I. Send me!</span>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-82765860864276859452009-06-20T12:34:00.004-05:002009-08-06T15:05:40.155-05:00War<span style="font-size:85%;"><span style="font-size:130%;">I am reminded today of the ever present world that surrounds us, the invisible one that is just as real as this one. From time to time I see glimpses of this, at times, terrifyingly real world.<br /></span><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:130%;" ><br />For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world rulers of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavens. Ephesians 6:14b<br /><br /></span><span style="font-size:130%;">I have been studying </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:130%;" >The Invisible War </span><span style="font-size:130%;">by Chip Ingram's Living on the Edge ministry. This study continues to open my eyes to the subtlety of Satan's attacks on believers. We engage in what he refers to as "guerilla warfare" with Satan and his demons daily, some days more than others. I learned, or should say was reminded, there are specific times Satan seems to attack more forcefully. A few of these times include: 1) Times of major spiritual growth 2) Any time we invade Enemy territory (the occult, Satanic cults, witchcraft, etc.) 3) Being involved in revealing who the Enemy truly is 4) After true repentance 5) When God is preparing us for great kingdom work<br /><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:130%;" >Sometimes the attacks can be more blatant. </span><span style="font-size:130%;">That's what Chip spoke about yesterday. Without going into any great detail or boasting, I have been dealing with attacks like this as of late. This comes as no surprise given the strongholds that God is bringing down. And God is always timely. It is no accident we studied that scripture yesterday.<br />The central point of </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:130%;" >The Invisible War</span><span style="font-size:130%;"> is the armor of God, which can be found in Ephesians chapter 6 verses 10- 18. One of the major ways we can fight back is the sword of the Spirit </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:130%;" >which is the word of God ( verse 17). </span><span style="font-size:130%;">I am working on memorizing scripture. Please pray for me in this endeavor.<br />The other major way we can fight back is through prayer.<br /></span><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:130%;" >With every prayer and petition, pray at all times in the Spirit, and to this end be alert, with all perseverance and requests for all the saints. (</span><span style="font-size:130%;">Verse 18)<br /><br />Believe me, I prayed until the wee hours of the morning, as did my dear husband after we received one of those 3 am phone calls. Again without going into great detail, one of the ministries we are part of has butted up against a stronghold and Satan is fighting back. I was not frightened but prayed and fell asleep. I woke up afraid and prayed some more.<br />For some odd reason, I thought of the scene in the movie </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:130%;" >Labyrinth</span><span style="font-size:130%;"> where the heroine realizes that the Goblin<br />king she has been fighting has no real power over her. See<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmgmXgoBZFo"> clip</a> ( it does have one curse word but the lesson is fantastic).<br />God also brought to mind scripture, which I emphasize is most important. Pray for me as I pray for you. Be strong in the Lord. Remember, any power Satan has is only power God allows him to have, for now.<br />In the end, we win.<br /></span><span style="font-style: italic;"><br /></span></span>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-76676141343522819582009-06-07T00:42:00.002-05:002009-06-07T01:23:57.602-05:00Grace<span class="body">When the solution is simple, God is answering.</span> <span class="bodybold"><span style="text-decoration: underline;">--Albert Einstein<br /></span></span><br /><br /><br />Sometimes the hardest things to grasp are the simple things.<br />Someone pointed out to me recently that I seem to have a lack of grace for others. Of course my immediate response was defensive., "I am not!" Time passed and I realized that this was a <span style="font-weight: bold;">very true </span>statement and has been for quite some time.<br />I have worried over some things that I probably cannot change so much that I have driven my husband crazy! He responded, "Do you really think about this all the time?" No wonder I was so joyless! Usually I felt like this was simply a lack of faith in God to provide, as over and over my husband has to remind me, "Who is our provider?"<br />I work myself sick trying to "do my part" in being responsible for myself and expect the same from others. I started to realize that my work and worry was due to the fact I don't think God <span style="font-style: italic;">should</span> provide for me because of failures, being irresponsible, etc. In my mind I thought, "Why would God even want to provide for me as often as I fail Him?" The truth is God should not do anything for any one of us but He does! This is grace, something I did not and never will deserve.<br />Paul says in Ephesians 1: 7, "In him we have redemption through his blood., the forgiveness of sin, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavishes on us." God has provided all I need through his son. Much more than I could ever deserve. I was dead in my sin but he has made me alive! I must live every day remembering how much he has given me. Not in how much I still owe him but how much I <span style="font-weight: bold;">have</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;">in Him.</span> I must let nothing convince me to earn that gift.<br />"For by grace you have been saved through faith, And it is not your doing but the gift of God (Ephesians 2 : 8)" Nothing I do can be good enough for God to save me but thankfully he does. What patience he has with me! <br /><span style="font-style: italic;"><br />God, forgive me for my impatience with my myself and others. Let me recognize evidence of your grace daily. Let me take hold of Your grace so I might act gracefully to others. Forgive me for forgetting how abundantly You have lavished me with Your grace.</span>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-1595777343710296622009-04-03T17:11:00.003-05:002009-04-06T16:17:46.800-05:00Bread truck MondayIt's already a Bread truck Monday.<br />I made reference to something last week Pastor Mark Driscoll calls "Bread truck Monday." He says as a pastor at times he wishes he could skip the meetings, the conflict, etc and simply drive a bread truck. He says he finds this idea appealing because "it smells like bread, I could listen to ESPN all day, and I wouldn't have to deal with the issues."<br />I can definitely identify with that. Last week I started my work week on Wednesday and I had a "bread truck Wednesday" experience. I <span style="font-style: italic;">really</span> did not want to go into work. I find myself doing this too often on the nights I go into work.<br />Most of us can identify with this idea but I find myself thinking, "God must want more from me than this." Sometimes all I can do to get through my three 12hour shifts is to think "only three days and then I am off." Vastly understated, I hate those three days I am on.<br />I think about the verse where it says, "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart." This is easier said than done when you are afraid of what may crop up during those 12 hours of insanity. But fear is not from God ( I John 4:8). ( But please note that fear and fear of God are two different things) The evil one gets a foothold when I fear and doubt and he motive is clear to "steal, kill and destroy" but Jesus came to give what the Satan intends to steal (John 10:10). How quickly I let the Enemy tell me all kinds of lies to further that purpose of stealing everything I have.<br />That's why I have to armor up as Pastor Travis Hurst spoke of yesterday with the armor of God and use the sword to combat Satan's lies ( Ephesians 6: 1-18).<br />So when that Bread truck Monday feeling comes for me... I know exactly how to fight back.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-67783239859134738632009-02-23T14:58:00.002-06:002009-02-23T15:09:11.634-06:00Well hello againI must attest to God's faithfulness even in the midst of what seems to be continued uncertainty. And no, I am not talking about the "economic recession." I finished my latest travel job at Harris Methodist Fort Worth Saturday night and now am reviewing other opportunities after the job I had lined out fell through unexpectedly. So I am asking, "Where are you taking me, God?" As Trevor's latest band/ministry, <a href="http://www.fightthefade.com">Fight the Fade</a>, gets more and more shows, I ask God again," Where are you taking <span style="font-style: italic;">us</span>?" I will continue to pray and seek God's truth through the Word.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-47801725991541925672009-01-11T20:04:00.002-06:002009-01-11T20:44:23.043-06:00What is beauty?<sup><a href="http://net.bible.org/bible.php?book=1Pe&chapter=3#n2" name="v2" onmouseover="jumpVerseNote('n2');"></a></sup><a name="2" href="http://net.bible.org/verse.php?book=1Pe&chapter=3&verse=2"></a><a name="3" href="http://net.bible.org/verse.php?book=1Pe&chapter=3&verse=3"><span class="vref"></span></a> Let your<sup> <a href="http://net.bible.org/bible.php?book=1Pe&chapter=3#n4" name="v4" onmouseover="jumpVerseNote('n4');"></a> </sup> beauty<sup> <a href="http://net.bible.org/bible.php?book=1Pe&chapter=3#n5" name="v5" onmouseover="jumpVerseNote('n5');"></a></sup> not be external – the braiding of hair and wearing of gold jewelry<sup> <a href="http://net.bible.org/bible.php?book=1Pe&chapter=3#n6" name="v6" onmouseover="jumpVerseNote('n6');"></a></sup> or fine clothes – <a name="4" href="http://net.bible.org/verse.php?book=1Pe&chapter=3&verse=4"><span class="vref"></span></a>but the inner person<sup> <a href="http://net.bible.org/bible.php?book=1Pe&chapter=3#n7" name="v7" onmouseover="jumpVerseNote('n7');"></a> </sup> of the heart, the lasting beauty of a gentle and tranquil spirit, which is precious in God’s sight. I Peter 3:3-4<br /><br /><br />As I sat in the company of Lois Eschenbrenner about a week ago, my mind came back to these verses.. We chatted about life--her children and grandchildren's activities, the recent holidays, etc. I started to consider all Lois has been through lately and how truly beautiful that woman is and how much she means to me and so many others.<br />The world, with its warped view of physical beauty, might miss someone like Lois in its lists of<br />"The Year's Top Ten Most Beautiful People" or the latest cover model on Vogue. Hollywood with all its everchanging fashions and trappings would surely overlook her on the street. Even so, she possesses a beauty that the world can only provide a cheap imitation.<br />I say all that to make clear that Lois Eschenbrenner <span style="font-style: italic;">is</span> beautiful. No doubt about it. She possesses the "lasting beauty of a gentle and tranquil spirit." Even as cancer and its subsequent treatments threaten her physical body, it cannot steal her hope. She looks to the future and places it completely in God's hands. I can only hope that as I grow in the grace of our Lord that I could be as lovely as Lois.<br /><br /><sup><a href="http://net.bible.org/bible.php?book=1Pe&chapter=3#n10" name="v10" onmouseover="jumpVerseNote('n10');"></a></sup><a href="http://net.bible.org/bible.php?book=1Pe&chapter=3#v4" name="n4" onmouseover="jumpVerseNote('v4');"></a>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-3177196028821171412008-12-27T02:50:00.003-06:002008-12-27T03:46:50.414-06:00So this is Christmas..."So this is Christmas and what have you done?"<br />---John Lennon, War is Over<br /><br />Ah Christmastime. I love it and hate it at the same time. I love the warm fuzzy feelings. Yet, just as quickly as this crazy season began, its over. This year has been more hectic than others since the Trevor Taylor family has made some strides in overcoming that beast called <span style="font-style: italic;">debt</span>, more precisely in the form of student loans.<br />So since August we have been working in two different states: he as a contractor in Oklahoma and me as a contract, or traveling, nurse. Started out in Temple, Texas. It was crazy but I had expected as much since the first try is usually a little crazy.<br />Since the end of October, negotiations started with a new company for a new location: Harris Methodist in Fort Worth. I feel like my life has become a whirlwind of one thing after another. Most of all I miss my friends in Oklahoma who have become so dear to my heart.<br />The three hour drive to Texas gives me a lot of time to ponder life so I have listened to some interesting sermons in my car. The latest is a series on faith called Five Things That Grow Your Faith by Andy Stanley, Senior Pastor at Northpoint Community Church. So as this season comes and I sometimes ask, "Why?" this sermon fell into my hands.<br />One of the things that helps grow faith are providential relationships. Since Christmas is a celebration of how Christ came into the world so it seems appropriate that I think about some people who entered my world and changed it forever. ( And this is by no means an exclusive list I am sure many more impacted my life than I can mention.)<br />First and foremost my parents influenced me at an early age to be in church and have kept encouraging my to have faith in God to direct my path. I remember how people like Barb Venable and Ron and Bettie Watson came into my life and encouraged me to learn about the Bible and how to have a relationship with God. George Pearson, Kevin Sellars, and Darrell Paulk took the time to teach me how to live out my faith. Claudette and I worked out our faith as we walked around Gordon many a night as we listened to each others' stories. The Haynes and Cherrys helped me develop my faith in college through some tough times. Julie, Brandee, and Elizabeth Erin , Karmen, Autumn and Jennifer were closer than sisters to me in my struggles and celebrations. I also met my husband and cannot say enough how much his life, words,and actions cause me to believe that God can and will win over all.<br />My husband's family has been good to me too in welcoming me into a second "family." Carla, Mark, Ty, Jess, Tiff, Travis, Denise and Kevin, all brought me in different ways. My Oklahoma "family" includes many sisters too like Alicia, Kendal, Michelle, Kim, Pam, Julie, Jena, Leslie, and many, many others from my church family and beyond. Our good friend Dave encourages with his words. I also have to mention the many in my Tri-State family as well: Jim, Lois, Sue, Dori, John, Teresa, Ben, Sam, Brandi, Holly, Matt, Marty, Andrea, Marvin, Linda, Christian, Kelsey, and so many others.<br />I start to think about how blessed I am to have so many providential relationships in my life. People who have entered my life like Christ did so many years ago, never to leave the world like he found it. "I thank my God in all my remembrance of you, always in every prayer of mine for you all making my prayer with joy." Phillipians 1: 1-2<br />So when my faith falters I think on "my people" and how God will make things right again. Until that day I will have to believe.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-50717780902804411942008-11-21T13:57:00.003-06:002008-11-21T14:43:16.718-06:00Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SScdW7-NMeI/AAAAAAAAATs/9FHfHcinjZ0/s1600-h/MomDad.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 231px; height: 320px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SScdW7-NMeI/AAAAAAAAATs/9FHfHcinjZ0/s320/MomDad.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271214168753385954" border="0" /></a><br />Happy Anniversary to my mom and dad. They are celebrating 35 years today.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-30909318616408542252008-11-21T10:53:00.013-06:002008-11-21T11:42:26.748-06:00Updated<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbr-1jqSQI/AAAAAAAAATY/fmqWgaGnI10/s1600-h/DSC_0203.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbr-1jqSQI/AAAAAAAAATY/fmqWgaGnI10/s320/DSC_0203.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271159878644812034" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbrYDbckgI/AAAAAAAAATQ/ONC4Bv19iRw/s1600-h/DSC_0196.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbrYDbckgI/AAAAAAAAATQ/ONC4Bv19iRw/s320/DSC_0196.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271159212353556994" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Trevor and I are doing well. Busy getting things "<span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">winter proof</span>" and working.<br />We also:<br />1) Took a trip to Kansas to the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Tri</span> State camp meeting on October 31st--November 1st. Nice to see camp friends and help plan <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Tri</span> State for this summer.<br />*Look at the new <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Tri</span> State camp site. I am excited how God's going to work this summer!<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbp3Hkn9_I/AAAAAAAAATA/H_WQAFzFxl4/s1600-h/DSC_0500.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 268px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbp3Hkn9_I/AAAAAAAAATA/H_WQAFzFxl4/s320/DSC_0500.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271157547018483698" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />2) Trevor and I have been communicating well. We have "tea times" almost every night.<br /><br />*This is us on the shores of Lake <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">Belton</span> outside <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Belton</span>, TX.<br /><br /><br /><br />3) After catching my electric range on fire yesterday we have done some rearranging in the kitchen to avoid further mishaps. Don't worry every one was fine. Just lost most of my potholders.<br /><br />4) I accepted a travel nurse job at Harris Methodist in Fort Worth. Its much closer and closer to my parents. They are way excited.<br /><br />5) Our friends, Nick and Christi Clemons finally had Isabella Faith on Tuesday, November 18<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">th</span>. Christi had been on <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">bed rest</span> for about 3 weeks for preterm labor complications. Isabella, who was actually 35 weeks gestational age, instead of the estimated 32 or 33 weeks, was 5 lbs 6 oz . She looks like a little doll. They were able to go home yesterday.<br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbpPTJWoeI/AAAAAAAAAS4/ghqZ8m_QB5A/s1600-h/100_0613.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbpPTJWoeI/AAAAAAAAAS4/ghqZ8m_QB5A/s320/100_0613.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271156862930559458" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbo9VMcuCI/AAAAAAAAASw/_J0XYuxkId0/s1600-h/100_0611.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbo9VMcuCI/AAAAAAAAASw/_J0XYuxkId0/s320/100_0611.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271156554242766882" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />7) I went to see my friend Jennifer in Tulsa. It was good to see her. She's a cute almost three months pregnant.<br />*The bunny is <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">house trained</span>! His names is Starbucks.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbotWyWwMI/AAAAAAAAASo/MzJ70dxhVgM/s1600-h/100_0615.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbotWyWwMI/AAAAAAAAASo/MzJ70dxhVgM/s320/100_0615.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271156279792287938" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />6) I enjoy helping with the Children's Ministry at Faith Christian Outreach, our church. I help with the 2-3's every other Sunday.<br />* Aren't they cute!<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSboTYXOE7I/AAAAAAAAASg/71Vnsv72H0c/s1600-h/100_0620.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSboTYXOE7I/AAAAAAAAASg/71Vnsv72H0c/s320/100_0620.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271155833538745266" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbn8iMqcYI/AAAAAAAAASY/jFfaNTYm934/s1600-h/DSC_0004.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OFkjbnXVtK8/SSbn8iMqcYI/AAAAAAAAASY/jFfaNTYm934/s320/DSC_0004.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271155441041830274" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />*8) Jack is doing well. He lies around and sleeps all day. Same old, same old. He enjoys going for walks and chasing squirrels in the backyard. Don't laugh he's our child (:<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />*Jack all bundled up and lying on the couch the Residence Inn. Yes, our dog does travel with us most of the time.<br /><br />*Sorry this is kind of backwards since Blogger uploads backwards. If the update has a picture, it is above the update.*<br /><br /><br /><br />To come this afternoon: an update regarding my parents!!!!Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-29651170454577653652008-11-05T14:32:00.003-06:002008-11-05T14:37:19.662-06:00A word to the wiseI have found the some of the critics of Bush to be disgraceful not only themselves but also to their country.<br />I warn that we should not be so hypocritical to do the same to Obama. Let us respect our leader and our country even if we have valid concerns.<br />Check out this <a href="http://www.onenewsnow.com/Blog/Default.aspx?id=311648">link </a>about how our fellow countrymen's harsh, and at times inappropriate, criticisms will affect us all.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-68144378232256400932008-10-31T07:55:00.002-05:002008-10-31T08:38:05.706-05:00Oh I am not finished yet....I had a situation with a patient's family member at work which left me very angry. By the way, for those of you who don't work in the health care profession, most of my problems come not from the patient but from the well meaning family member who usually just ends up delaying things by getting in the way, causing more problems, etc. If you find this is you, please just go home for a little while and let us do our job, not what you have determined is our job from your uninformed position. It took me 9 years to get where I am now and an expensive degree and license.<br />As I worked through that anger and basically being told I had done nothing for the patient ( and I had done a whole lot of something for the patient just not what the family member wanted). He basically told me I was a bad nurse and complained to hospital because I did not do everything the way he wanted it done. Also on a side note, this family member is supposedly a health care professional. You would think a fellow health care professional would understand what all I had done that night or be understanding but usually they are the worst.<br />I realized I was to some degree avoiding that patient's room because I knew nothing I did would be good enough for that man and I couldn't take care of the problem. I was hoping by her not calling out I had somehow fixed the issue with my efforts but I knew it wouldn't. Yes like most people I avoid things I don't know how to fix. Doesn't mean I hadn't done anything for her, it just means I knew it was going to take more than me to fix it and I had other people to take care of too.<br />I came to realize from all this something Trevor has told me for some time now, I let other people control how I feel about myself. I had always said, "But what do I do about it?" Or vehemently denied it. I guess listening to the series on the heart got me thinking, "Hey it is taking a lot of energy and strength to worry about what other people think about me."<br />Wow I know, what an epiphany.<br />One thing that travel nursing has helped me with in my self esteem is to<span style="font-weight: bold;"> know</span> that I am a good nurse. I have worked hard and I care about my patients. I guess I have come a long way from last year when my former boss told me my patients didn't feel I cared for them. Or from the experiences at a local hospital where I get attitude every day from fellow staff for just being me.( I have some more thoughts on that one coming up) I started to realize I have a lot of people telling or accusing me of things that are just not true. As a truly caring person I had always let things affect me deeply. Things that I am sure most people just pass off as, "That person doesn't even know me why would I let them affect me?"<br />I have come to know just how much I have <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">let</span> other peoples' issues affect me. From today on I will not let other peoples' jealousy and problems with themselves weigh me down. I came to the understanding with Andy's sermon that the reason these people were treating me like crap is a) because I let them b) because they are jealous of me!<br />This last part was like a light bulb coming on in my head. I just thought, "It all makes sense! But why?" The why doesn't matter. This just helps me be a better person because I realize it wasn't me they had a problem with.<br />I thank God I understand this now. The next step is learning from it. "Either you learn from it, or run from it."---Rafiki, from the Lion King.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-2230942694385954022008-10-31T07:13:00.002-05:002008-10-31T07:54:48.861-05:00Wow! I know what you are thinking, two posts in two consecutive days! After this they may be even fewer and far between for a few days.<br />The three month contract with Scott and White is up in one week. Can't say I am all too sad to leave that hospital. The experience has not been altogether pleasant--or even unpleasant for that matter but always enlightening. Negotiations are underway with a new company that just has a few more options that could be better for us.<br />I was able to sleep in my bed for the night. Most of it with the little furry friend curled up next to me. (Jack, unfortunately, not Trevor for most of the night) I have plenty to do today. As part of my devotion today I wanted to blog about a series I have been listening to in the car called It Came From Within by Andy Standley from Northpointe Ministries.<br />The series explains how to have a clean heart, from a biblical but different approach than I have ever seen.<br />The first message was on the condition of the heart and why we often say things that often surprise even us. Proverbs 4 :23 says, "Above all else guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." The first step to doing anything well in life, loving, leading,etc is to keep your heart clean.<br />Jesus talks about where those unexpected outbursts come from, your heart. Those things that come out and everybody, including you is thinking,"Where in the world did that come from?" Jesus says it comes from the heart. Due to time restraints I will reference where the Pharisees question Jesus about not washing his hands before he ate ( not eww gross he didn't wash at all but the ceremonial bla,bla,bla the Pharisees did for show). Jesus replies it is not what comes out of a man that makes him unclean but what goes into him. Meaning what is on the inside matters more than what is on the outside. Those little outbursts come from an unclean heart. Andy says these things get through our filter. Our filter is what we learn from an early age to maintain relationships,etc to keep what is in our heart hidden. The filter comes from when we learn at age 5 we can't say that certain word ( for me it was butt, thanks Mom) or we get in trouble. When we say things uncharacteristically for us those things just make it past our filter. Doesn't mean they weren't always there, just means we learned to filter. I have discovered my filter often gets broken at work, when all the stress brings our rotten things from my heart.<br />The second message was on guilt and how unchecked it can weigh us down and ruin all our relationships, not just with the person we have wronged. Andy explains how we have to go to the person we have wronged to rid ourselves of guilt. Confession does no good if we only confess to God since he already knows. We have to go to the person we have wronged to truly make things right.<br />In the next message that Hideous Thing, Andy describes what envy can do to a person. Its not what you have always heard preached either. (I couldn't do his description justice so if you are interested I can get you the sermon series). In short we treat others who have more____ whatever better because of envy. Our problem is not with them but with God. "God why didn't you give me____?"<br />So far I have a long laundry list for my own heart, people to confess my wrong doing to and it won't be easy. I have to, though, to make my heart clean.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-46397104415758182532008-10-30T08:13:00.002-05:002008-10-30T08:18:44.309-05:00"I'm coming home but I'm still a long way off."Jack and I are heading back to Oklahoma after a short nap. This is brief for my adoring "fans" who check my blog daily for updates. I have been keeping things updated with twitter. Maybe there is a similar thing for blogger? We'll see...<br />Heading to Kansas tomorrow afternoon with Trev for a Tri State meeting.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24810189.post-12791492923966600232008-10-07T15:49:00.003-05:002008-10-07T16:03:23.993-05:00My favorite things about fallI have thinking about how much I love Fall. October, in particular, is so beautiful! Here's what I love about Fall:<br /><ul><li>The weather is perfect! I have been enjoying walks and front porch tea times chats with Trevor every night when we are home.</li><li>The leaves change colors. Well maybe not as much in Shawnee. I have fond memories of traveling to Missouri at this time of year. Also a I think of a trip I went on last fall to South Carolina and Tennessee. Sigh, maybe next year.</li><li>Craving Jack-o-lanterns. I say this instead of Halloween because I like other things about fall besides this holiday. Maybe I will get more into it when I have kids. Craving pumpkins is fun though. I will post our pics when we do our carving.</li></ul><br />I am sure there are more I can't think of now. What are your favorite things about fall?Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06000022309372764265noreply@blogger.com0